at the risk of sounding like a nutter...

[sher]

ya, I've had that feeling, too. nothing came of it. big punch in the gut everytime I saw him, always knew when he would call or come by cause a feeling would come over me, but he wasn't the one. but a connection was there.
I put it on the reincarnation side, when there is that type of connection I think it has a something to do with knowing them before, and recognizing them again.

or you could just literally be on the same wavelength. Whatever the reason, over-analyzing these things can sometimes diminish their strength - my opinion.

enjoy it. hang onto it, savour it. accept it. DON'T apologize for it.

I have spoken.

The reincarnation idea is interesting, one that I hadn't given much thought to in this situation. I hope I haven't over analysed it because that would be quite sad to think that I may have added to its intensity by over thinking it. It's a very raw, real emotion-like a wake up call from deep within.

I did tell the person recently, that when we first met that I felt like I had met them before and that it was like I had been waiting but not known it. They told me that they also felt that. If that's true, then that's just beautiful,really special and I think I am very lucky to have had that connection-though for only a time.

Evidently he wasn't 'The One' for me, it seems that there has been block after block against anything developing between us- I find that quite perplexing but I do accept it because I believe if something's meant to be, then it will be.

Thank you all for your thoughts

xxx

 

[dianadee13]

Thanks for that David, people like that make it feel unsafe to express their experiences without fear of ridicule. Sher, I know what you mean about this stuff and its not weird atall unless you call our natural chemistry weird, or our inner knowing that someone important in our lives has arrived. Its not always bound to be a romantic connection you'll have with that person either, just someone who has arrived in our lives to teach or to share our part of our journey with. Theres a chemistry there.

 

[Magic_Juan]

Like I mentioned in my original reply.
I have had strong visceral reactions to people, like there was an invisible cord or string going from the middle of my chest to theirs (sounds strange I know). And this extreme reaction has been illicited by just encountering the other person in passing. An example was a woman I saw in a mall recently (2 months ago). I was not physically atracted to her at all and I seemed to notice this feeling before even seeing her! I felt the urge to turn my head and look in exactly the same direction as she was. She was walking on the opposite side of the mall aisle as me and a good 15-20ft away walking the opposite direction. She was talking with her friend and did not even notice my glance. I was absolutely bizarre and left me asking WTF? This all took place in a span of 15-20 seconds before she was out of view. But everything arround be was blotted out for those fleeting moments and then resumed when she was gone. An let me make this perfectly clear, I felt absolutely zero romantic or physical attraction to her and to reiterate - I had the feeling before I actual caught glimpse or her.
Very Strange!

 

[dianadee13]

Like I mentioned in my original reply.
I have had strong visceral reactions to people, like there was an invisible cord or string going from the middle of my chest to theirs (sounds strange I know). And this extreme reaction has been illicited by just encountering the other person in passing. An example was a woman I saw in a mall recently (2 months ago). I was not physically atracted to her at all and I seemed to notice this feeling before even seeing her! I felt the urge to turn my head and look in exactly the same direction as she was. She was walking on the opposite side of the mall aisle as me and a good 15-20ft away walking the opposite direction. She was talking with her friend and did not even notice my glance. I was absolutely bizarre and left me asking WTF? This all took place in a span of 15-20 seconds before she was out of view. But everything arround be was blotted out for those fleeting moments and then resumed when she was gone. An let me make this perfectly clear, I felt absolutely zero romantic or physical attraction to her and to reiterate - I had the feeling before I actual caught glimpse or her.
Very Strange!

It all started for me when I was at school and I had a gut feeling about my art teacher. For some reason I just wanted to be with her, like she had more to teach me than just art. One day she mentioned a city here in the Uk and I instinctively 'knew' I'd be there sometime in my life. Never thought about it again after that but some years later, I found myself living in that city. Then I remembered what she'd said all those years before. Turned out this was exactly the place I needed to be at that time in my life and I lived there for many years learning and growing in myself. Just before I left there, I met with someone on a course and once again had that strong feeling of connection. But it didnt feel like the right time to connect but I just knew we'd meet again in the future. A couple of years went by, then out of the blue a friend reintroduced me to this person and I ended up house sharing with them. We are very like minded in many ways, though nothing romantic like. Still Ive learnt so much from them and they from me. Its amazing how it all works. I can only think that on some deeper level we 'know' who who we need in life for whatever reason that may be.

 

[AnnetteMarie]

I am a strong believer in that we meet who we need to, in order to either help them through something, or help ourselves through something. Friends are not always meant to be in your life until you die, some are only meant to be your friend for a season, or a reason.
There are others who do remain life-long friends, but often we cling to a friendship that has passed its days, when we would be much better off accepting it for what it was, and let it go.
Some of those folks we feel that deep connection to but nothing comes of it, or there are blocks in each way you approach a relationship with them, perhaps you are being prevented from having that relationship because it, in turn, would prevent you from being where you later needed to be, either physically or emotionally.

I do trust that things work out they way they are supposed to, even though it is not always the way I would like.

 

[tyder001]

I'll go way out on a limb here. I have always had certain "feelings" or "memories" of a former life or lives. Hard to describe but I feel like we come here as a part of a group soul. (Guess I sound like a nutter) But I "know" who one of my soulmates "maybe even my twin soul is." Can't have a relationship this time and I know that. But I've known ever since we were kids on some level that we have a "relationship" Now I am happily married and have a child of my own and am in no way "looking" or stalking or being an idiot. But I honestly believe there is a place and a time when this part of the journey is over that I will again "know" this certain person. Man when I hit "post" I may have to hide for a week around here. Cause this sounds uhhh...sappy? or silly or pie in the sky. But there it is.

 

[AnnetteMarie]

nah, don't hide. just invest in a really good disguise

 

[aaronpsych]

Interesting post Sher, I must say I felt the same 'spark' upon meeting my wife many moons ago. I have not felt this with anyone else since. I've often attributed this feeling to the synchronicity acausal connecting principle. For some reason I've lately been feeling that there is a grand plan or fateline at work wherein I have little agency. If I listen to the signs that my intuition give me then I navigate safely and swiftly along this line, if I don't listen then I get stuck along the way.

I have to say that these feelings and theories significantly conflict with my scientific training! However, I'm starting to believe that there's that which you feel and that which you perceive.

 

[dianadee13]

I'll go way out on a limb here. I have always had certain "feelings" or "memories" of a former life or lives. Hard to describe but I feel like we come here as a part of a group soul. (Guess I sound like a nutter) But I "know" who one of my soulmates "maybe even my twin soul is." Can't have a relationship this time and I know that. But I've known ever since we were kids on some level that we have a "relationship" Now I am happily married and have a child of my own and am in no way "looking" or stalking or being an idiot. But I honestly believe there is a place and a time when this part of the journey is over that I will again "know" this certain person. Man when I hit "post" I may have to hide for a week around here. Cause this sounds uhhh...sappy? or silly or pie in the sky. But there it is.

There is nothing to hide from. Many religions and beliefs are formed around the idea of reincarnation, its only us in the west who tend to think its absurd. Personally, I believe in this and try to live my life around the idea of not coming back yet again to work on unresolved 'stuff'. So if you get laughed at, then so do I too, but I'm NOT going to let it trouble me!!

 

[Will Penguin]

A year ago, I would not have understood what someone meant when they talked about that feeling of things just "clicking". But last Summer I started spending time with my now-fiance (we'd known each other just to say a casual "hi" for years, but until then neither of us were available) and we became pretty much inseperable from the first date. And every single day since, I've woken up even more in love. It's that "where have you been my whole life?" feeling.

 

[sher]

A year ago, I would not have understood what someone meant when they talked about that feeling of things just "clicking". But last Summer I started spending time with my now-fiance (we'd known each other just to say a casual "hi" for years, but until then neither of us were available) and we became pretty much inseperable from the first date. And every single day since, I've woken up even more in love. It's that "where have you been my whole life?" feeling.

Lovely story! yes, and that's a feeling like no other isn't it. It's like coming home in a sense..

Everyone who has replied so far has given excellent points of view, ones I had not even considered but now that I have, a lot do make sense really and it's certainly shed a whole new light on all of this for me.

Cheers all

xxxx

 

[sher]

I am a strong believer in that we meet who we need to, in order to either help them through something, or help ourselves through something. Friends are not always meant to be in your life until you die, some are only meant to be your friend for a season, or a reason.
There are others who do remain life-long friends, but often we cling to a friendship that has passed its days, when we would be much better off accepting it for what it was, and let it go.
Some of those folks we feel that deep connection to but nothing comes of it, or there are blocks in each way you approach a relationship with them, perhaps you are being prevented from having that relationship because it, in turn, would prevent you from being where you later needed to be, either physically or emotionally.

I do trust that things work out they way they are supposed to, even though it is not always the way I would like.

I just re-read this reply, and I have to say that that's a great and very healthy way of viewing any kind of relationship and your words are helpful! I had a best friend for eight years whom I worked with-so close we felt like sisters, in time we both left that place of work and after that we lost touch. I see her around, I've even asked her to come over for a catch up, nope-nothing. For a time I was sad, really missed her, my best friend but lately I have started to see that maybe she needed to move on, I don't know, and I don't understand but like you say, not all friends are there forever- I guess I have to accept that.

Another thing is, about meeting people for season and reasons, well with regards to the person I have written about I am still waiting for the picture to become clear as to why we met, the sole reason for all of this, but I don't want to think think and think lol! just 'let it be':

I've been with someone now for three years, and THAT was completely outta the blue! lol..so yea..I guess you can never predict or control who comes in and out of your life, just sit back and let the big picture paint itself.

 

[aNorthernSoul]

Could the "connection" you feel be that some segment of your "self" (souls/spirits/consciousness... or whatever) knows each other elsewhere? Perhaps in a different time, universe or something? Or, if we are all connected in some sort of global consciousness, maybe your two parts are simply more connected/similar then other segmentations of the global consciousness? Or perhaps it's just your inner self demanding that you take note of this person? I think there is a lot of background understanding required to know what exactly is going on in those circumstances. At the same time though, why not just enjoy it? Maybe sometimes we question too much...

Anyway, more mental diarrhea from me, I guess. Sorry.

 

[sher]

Could the "connection" you feel be that some segment of your "self" (souls/spirits/consciousness... or whatever) knows each other elsewhere? Perhaps in a different time, universe or something? Or, if we are all connected in some sort of global consciousness, maybe your two parts are simply more connected/similar then other segmentations of the global consciousness? Or perhaps it's just your inner self demanding that you take note of this person? I think there is a lot of background understanding required to know what exactly is going on in those circumstances. At the same time though, why not just enjoy it? Maybe sometimes we question too much...

Anyway, more mental diarrhea from me, I guess. Sorry.

No don't be sorry at all! this is exactly why I threw the topic/question/experience out for discussion, I need and appreciate all views unless they are hurtful and disrespectful on purpose-but then, I do have dB to help with those kinda folk!

I was getting fed up with my own narrow minded point of view about the whole experience, because I know what I'd like it to all mean yet the more sensible side of me(there is one!!), expected that there would be other ways of looking at it and I'm open to that

I'm grateful that people have taken the time to respond so fully and openly!

 

[aNorthernSoul]

No don't be sorry at all! this is exactly why I threw the topic/question/experience out for discussion, I need and appreciate all views unless they are hurtful and disrespectful on purpose-but then, I do have dB to help with those kinda folk!

I was getting fed up with my own narrow minded point of view about the whole experience, because I know what I'd like it to all mean yet the more sensible side of me(there is one!!), expected that there would be other ways of looking at it and I'm open to that

I'm grateful that people have taken the time to respond so fully and openly!

Oh, I totally know where you are coming from there. I am the same way. I just find it funny how when I reread my posts usually there are more questions than answers or just philosophical what ifs without any real direction. I suppose it's a fault... or possibly a blessing.

One thing perhaps slightly related is a personal experience I've never known what to make of. I have dreamed of the same person off and on for many years now. Not only do we seem to also age in the dreams appropriately as time has gone on but they are also very odd dreams. We just sort of hang out and talk and they seem very lucid, much more so than regular dreams... though I never think to myself that I am dreaming within it. They are unlike most other dreams I have in that they lack any real happenings and everything just seems every day in the dream. It's something I've never quite understood, but the person seems like a part of my life now even if only something I dream up when I'm sleeping. I've never met this person nor ever felt like someone MIGHT be them, but they seem very real after having the dreams for such a long time. Anyway, perhaps in some way it is related. Perhaps we have relationships that we aren't 100% aware of.... or maybe I'M the "nutter."

 

[sher]

A year ago, I would not have understood what someone meant when they talked about that feeling of things just "clicking". But last Summer I started spending time with my now-fiance (we'd known each other just to say a casual "hi" for years, but until then neither of us were available) and we became pretty much inseperable from the first date. And every single day since, I've woken up even more in love. It's that "where have you been my whole life?" feeling.

Those words just seem to sum up exactly how it felt when I met this person-I'm re-reading these replies and finding more answers than I found when I first read them!

I seem to go through seasons of missing them(my friend) and I am at the moment, this is what's prompted me to re-read this thread.

Once again, thanks all for your points of view x

 

[Yestopia]

This very topic happened to me this morning. Ahh, The Knowing.

In this case it is not urgent that I act on it. It indicates a force/forces best left enjoyed and not pushed.

Also, now that I'm in my 40's, Chad and the boys don't run the ship anymore. Appreciation of another is an amazing gift but in my youth I often wanted to boink the gift. "Yout".

Thanks for this.

 

[sher]

And so....after almost two years since I posted this 'experience' I can now bring the conclusion to it all. Almost six years since our first meeting have passed and I recently saw this person again after five years,he made contact and asked to see me and I was in the right place personally to do so, no longer did I keep how I felt close to my heart and I have told him just how strongly I feel-to no avail, there is and will be no reciprocation , it was always going to be a one way thing, though I hadn't felt it was that over the years of having sporadic contact and offering support where it was needed, he knows I love him now-I feel somewhat lighter for telling him, after carrying it in my heart for all those years, but on the other hand, I ache now even worse than before, but I suppose that's only natural in this circumstance. I will never fully understand why I had to meet him, why I thought of him every single day over five years, and that he was the first and last thing on my mind every day. He still is special, but I can't get near him and I feel that if I push for contact, I will damage whatever amount of friendship we have left. So, there we are, the ending to all of this, I'm none the wiser though!, but, he has written the ending and I really feel, it's now a closed book.