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Scraping the bottom of the paranormal barrel


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Jose Collado

Jose Collado

Skilled Investigator
I'm not a huge fan of Paranormal TV shows. Never have been. I used to think they're great entertainment. Now, I just think they're frustratingly stupid.

I got a message on Facebook from a group who have been chosen to film a TV series here in Australia. I've looked into it thinking it was a joke. Unfortunately...not. This is going to be mind numbingly painful to watch. if their website bares any resemblance to their final product then I'm going to shoot my TV.

Another Stupid Paranormal TV show

I must admit...their evidence section had me in tears. They're either completely clueless or comic geniuses. I just had to share this.
 
Have you seen a show called "Extreme Paranormal"? I think it's new but then again I could just be out of the loop.

It's awful. I mean truely awful in the sense that watching it fills you with awe at the sheer absurdity of what is ostensibly a serious show.

The only way I can descibe it is if you took the very worst elements of Most Haunted, Paranormal State, Ghost Hunters and Destination: Truth and combined them in a manner that makes the Blair Witch Project look like oscar-winning cinema.
 
Holy freaking cow man. I've never seen it but now I have to. I don't want to...I just have to. I'm sure, with the aid of your description, that I'll be well prepared for a disappointing waste of bandwidth.
 
If you do you're a stronger man than I, for I could not watch more than five minutes at a stretch. I did come back to it about ten minutes later to see if maybe the part I had seen was just unusually excessive in it's inept horrendousness but no, a further five minutes viewing confirmed it's pretty much that bad all the time.
 
Television programs aren't made for paranormal afficianados - in order to be successful, they have to appeal to a much broader audience. That always results in "compromises" that will frustrate, and even anger, paranormal die-hards, in much the same way that many orginal Bob Dylan fans got angry when he went electric all those years ago (or in my day, U2 fans got angry when they released "Pop").

Some shows are indeed truly awful. Others manage to find the right balance. But the truth is that none of them are ever going to come up with any real answers. It's entertainment. If you're looking for great scientific revelations, or hard evidence that will absolutely prove the existence of -------- (fill in the blank - UFOs, ghosts, whatever), you're not going to get it, and frankly, you shouldn't expect to get it from a 1/2 hour or 1 hour television program. What you can reasonably expect are engaging hosts, a good story, and - if you're lucky - a production that manages to take the subject seriously even as it "goes electric." ;)

Paul
 
Honestly, I don't expect anything from any paranormal related TV show be it 30 mins or 30 hours. If I want scientific revelations or hard evidence then I'll steer clear of anything remotely paranormal related on TV.
 
There is no scraping the bottom of this barrel.
Once you scrape your way to the bottom of one, you realize it's just the bottom of a smaller barrel stacked on top of another larger one...ad infinitum.
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Oh shit I almost shot soft pretzel through my nose looking at this stuff. It seriously is funny, please take a look.... at the levitating man, evil skull, or shadow person. Just don't eat or drink anything while you are perusing the "evidence".

I haven't looked, but this is serious?? Or a spoof??
 
skunkape said:
There is no scraping the bottom of this barrel.
Once you scrape your way to the bottom of one, you realize it's just the bottom of a smaller barrel stacked on top of another larger one...ad infinitum.<input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden">
Click to expand...

That's... horrifyingly accurate...:frown:
 
TClaeys said:
Oh shit I almost shot soft pretzel through my nose looking at this stuff. It seriously is funny, please take a look.... at the levitating man, evil skull, or shadow person. Just don't eat or drink anything while you are perusing the "evidence".

I haven't looked, but this is serious?? Or a spoof??
Click to expand...

I thought it was a parody but unfortunately not. I was informed it's genuine. I really can't wait to see this.
 
For you reading enjoyment, the full thread of my exchange with "Glenn". I posted the first few messages on that other thread, but here's the whole thing. Too fucking funny.

Australian Paracast listeners, let's take these guys down. I'm willing to help, say the word.

-----------------------------------------------

Glenn,

Please, PLEASE tell me that the photos in your "Proof" section are satire.

Seriously - the "shadow" on the glass, the "red eye" flash effect, all the other stuff - you're not seriously suggesting that there's anything enigmatic about any one of those photos, are you?
dB

----


Hi dB, we are professional paranormal investigators. Nothing we do is satire. I dont see a problem with our evidence page. The shadow person phenomena has been reported everywhere and red eyes on film have been linked with possessions. I dont know why but I'm guessing your one of those skeptics. No proof is ever good enough for skeptics.

Glenn

-----

Glenn,

If you take the time to do an even cursory search of my
name, you will find out exactly who I am - an experiencer,
highly-respected paranormal podcast host (The Paracast) and one of the
top Photoshop experts (I wrote the very first book ever
written about the program, and worked at ILM in 1991, doing visual
effects using Photoshop 2.0) involved in analyzing anomalous
photographs for some of the top researchers/organizations in the world.
Your "red-eye" picture is the result of a flash photo illuminating the
blood vessels at the back of eyes with open irises, such a common
photographic artifact with flash photography, that Photoshop, Photoshop
Elements and Photoshop Lightroom all have dedicated "red-eye" removal
tools. That one "shadow person" photo of a guy with a shadow behind
him, is right in front of a pane of glass, it's obviously his
reflection. I can explain every single one of those photos, EVERY ONE,
no problem. Am I a logical, skeptical thinker? Absolutely. Am I fully
aware that there are paranormal realities that defy current scientific
understanding? Absolutely. Type my name into Google before responding,
you'll look like less of a fool, if that's even possible. You've
already proven to me that your research and critical thinking skills
are non-existent.

dB

-----

Dear Mr Biedney, if you had bothered to google my name you would realise that I am one of Australias most respected paranormal experts. I've never heard of you and I dont care about your podcast because I am going to be on television and that beats your podcast hands down. My red eye picture was analysed by our field photographer and she agrees that it is due to demonic possession. Ofcourse you can explain all the photos because your a skeptic and that is what skeptics do. They dont open their mind.

I am a man of psience. Not your typical ghost hunter. If my research and critical thinking are non-existent then why am I being interviewed for magazines and talk radio?

Go back to your skeptic friends and tell them to stop emailing me. I dont care what you or your friends think. We are 100% legit.

Glenn

------

"Glenn",

You're a 100% actual spoof.

Your "organization" acronym is C.R.A.P.

You have no last personal name associated with your site, your images are
shit, and there are absolutely no web references to your organization.
The text on your site is idiotic. You're a joke, and you've been outed.
If you want to try and do Kaufman gags, that takes actual intelligence
and talent, two tools lacking in your lunch box. Better luck next time.

dB

-----

What do you mean we are crap? You dont even know us. Our website was given to us so if you have a problem with it then take it up with the Television mob and their web designer.

Why dont you just stick to your radio show and leave paranormal investigation to us professionals.

Glenn

-----

You're a professional idiot. You couldn't investigate the source of your own farts. Your C.R.A.P. hats are not gonna sell real well, Glenny. Nobody wants to be a shithead, except perhaps you and your merry band of morons.

Andy woulda yawned.
dB

-----


What are you on about mate? Who the hell is Andy? Your one of those idiots from the other team arent you? HAHAHA! Go and tell Beverley that her days are numbered. We are the best. Not yous.

Go away

-----

Glenn,

Based on your emails and that CRAP site, if the "other team" are "idiots", then you bunch must need help wiping your own asses.

Andy. Kaufman. TV show being better than radio show. Buy a clue.

Your command for subtlety ain't there. You obviously haven't lifted a finger to figure out my background. You couldn't investigate yourself out of a paper bag. If you're not some sort of sad spoof, you're an even sadder nitwit.

I'm sharing this email thread on the discussion forum on the site for our show, our many Australian fans are certainly getting a kick out of it. They brought you and your merry band of idiots to my attention in the first place. You should see what they have to say about you - oh, that's right, you think I'm from the "other team". Yeah, the team of humans with working brains.

Sayonara, sucker.
dB

------

And with that, folks, I think I've wasted enough time communication directly with this yutz. Anyone wanting to point their Australian friends, or perhaps the folks supposedly hiring these morons, to this thread is encouraged to do so.

dB
 
As I was reading David's last post,"The 3 Stooges" was on the tube in the other room and I heard Moe say "Why don't you get a toupee with some brains in it!?"
C.R.A.P.
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I thought i would send the guys from C.R.A.P an updated FAQ page for them to use as i thought this would be more relevant. Can't wait for the response!!!

Here is a copy of my FAQ:
 

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